Sabotaging Your Own Treatment

Regardless of the type of problem you are facing or what type of therapy you choose to help you work through it, merely asking for the help is not enough to reach a resolution. Many people unwittingly prevent their therapists from being of any assistance. While you may say, “Please help me,” your behavior may be saying, “I do not want your help!”

Being aware of things that can derail your therapy can help you get the most out of the therapy process and achieve optimal results.

Unrealistic Expectations

therapistTherapy is not magic, nor is it an easy fix: it requires a lot of time and hard work to truly reach the desired outcome.


The therapist is not there to judge you or lay blame. He simply listens to all of the information and determines which factors may be contributing to specific problems. Without accurate information, he cannot provide accurate advice. In the end, fabricating information or omitting details only hurts you. A client who is not ready to be open and honest with his therapist has is not ready to confront his issues and work toward solutions.

Lack of Personal Responsibility

It is difficult to acknowledge when you are wrong. However, blaming others for choices you have made does not change anything. Admitting that you have anger issues because other people provoke you is still blaming someone else. While you have no control over the actions and behavior of others, you can control the way you react.

Relying Solely on the Session

No situation can be resolved in a one hour session. You have to take the tools and techniques you learn in therapy and apply them outside of the therapists office. Additionally, ‘homework’ that your therapist assigns is to help you work through your problems. Therefore if you only put in effort during your therapy session, you are only doing half of the work and almost guaranteeing failure.

Too Many Goals

In therapy, you have to select one goal at a time. Although there may be several things you want to accomplish, jumping around from one issue to the next will only hinder your progress. Prioritize your goals by which is most significant to you, then work on them one by one.

Problems, whether in your career, marriage or health do not develop over night and neither do lasting solutions. Movies and television make it seem as if therapy only requires a few session to cure someone. However, most individuals can spend months or even years working through their problems. Never compare your progress to something you have seen or heard.

There are no “typical” problems or answers because each situation is different. Thus, no one can predict how, when or why your treatment will work. The only measure of therapy’s effectiveness is your personal thoughts, feelings and instincts. But if you do the work and trust the process, results will come.

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